Monday, September 5, 2011

Twenty Questions


CONVERSATIONS WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS

For the past 15 years, I’ve been traveling in an RV, crisscrossing the country every Spring and Fall it seems.  My official home is in Vermont;  however, I have spent a good many months out west around Arizona.  I’ve worked summers at Yellowstone National Park, and at the North and South Rims of the Grand Canyon, and at Bryce Canyon National Park.  I’ve also wintered at Quartzsite, camping in the desert with RV clubs and friends, and I loved camping at The Slabs and Borrego Springs in the weeks prior to the big Quartzsite events. 

So, when I do return home, it’s usually only for a very short time  - a couple of weeks, maybe a month.  Conversations with family, friends, and neighbors usually start with:

FRIEND A:  “How long are you staying this time?”

This year, I am home all summer and fall, an unheard of event for me.  So, the conversations continue:

                ME:  “I’m here until after the holidays, and then I’m leaving again.” 
No one, not even me, can conceive of me staying in one place too long, so I reassure them that yes, I am leaving again.

                FRIEND A:  “Where are going then?”

                ME:  “ Um, I’m going on a cruise.” 
That in itself is news. 

                FRIEND A:  “A cruise? – where to?” 
That’s them thinking I’m going to the Caribbean – I can hear it in their question – because that’s what Northerners do in the cold winter months  -  we escape for a week to the tropics to remind ourselves that there is a sun and warm weather somewhere.

                ME:  “Um, around the world.”  
Spoken half apologetically, half excitedly.

                FRIEND A:  “Around the world?” 
I can see the brain cells waking up, rushing to and fro.  “Around the world!?”, they usually repeat.

                ME:  “Um, yeah”.   
As though I’ve won the lottery and won’t be sharing, sorry.

                FRIEND A:  “When do you leave?” 
This is always the fifth question, if you’re counting.

                ME:  “January 6, 2012”.

                FRIEND A:  “How long will you be gone?” 
This is always the sixth question.

                ME:  “Four months.  We return April 28”.

                FRIEND A:  “Four months?!” 
They always repeat that as if not comprehending the words:  FOUR----MONTHS.

                ME:  I feel the need to elucidate:  “112 days, 16 weeks, 4 months”

                FRIEND A:  Where do you leave from?” 
This is always the eighth question (not counting the repeating of the “where to” or time frame).

                ME:  I run through the itinerary from Fort Lauderdale to Fort Lauderdale, trying to mention as many ports as I can remember and as many as I think they will know, mentioning side trips to Ayers Rock, The Great Wall of China, Petra.

                FRIEND A:  “Who’s going with you?”   
It’s not that they don’t expect me be going alone; it’s that they cannot conceive of themselves going alone, so they appear relieved when I say,

                ME:  “I have a friend I met in 2001 at an RV event, and we’ve kept in touch, and she decided she’d like to go, too.  I was all prepared to go alone, but it will be nice having someone to talk to at the end of the day.”

                FRIEND A:  “So, what made you decide to go on a cruise like this?”

                ME:  I say with a smile and laugh, “Well, according to sources, the world is going to end as we know it in December 2012, so I figured I’d better go now.”

                FRIEND A:  Thinking over that tidbit……

                ME:  Again, I elucidate, “I’ve always wanted to go – I had a world cruise booked in 2001, but that was the year my dad died, so I didn’t.”

Depending on the person, the conversation and questions veer to clothing, weather, more details on ports of call, and excursions.  But, inevitably, the next two questions pop up:

                FRIEND A:  “So, how much does a cruise like this cost?”

                ME:   “Well, you can spend anywhere from $20,000 to $100,000 or more if you want.  All depends on your cabin choice.” 
Thinking, that’s a question for Ann Landers – we all know you’re not supposed to ask the cost. If you have to ask, you can’t afford it, is the common wisdom. But, with family and friends, I know it’s really just curiosity, not envy, not bad manners.  With strangers, I usually point out the website address and say, “check it out.” 

And, finally, the last question:

                FRIEND A:  “Got room in your suitcase for me?”

People are so predictable. J 

Believe me, there won’t be room enough in our stateroom for my friend and I and all our clothes, not to mention a friend or two stuffed into our luggage.  Maybe next time.